Dear Chester,
It's been three years,
but for me it's like the time froze at that day, which changed my little world.

I always wanted to see you and say: "Chester, thank you", you are my hero. You gave me the strength to keep going on with this life, you always had the words to express my feelings. Your loss left a scar on my heart and it will never be the same. Chester, as you said:" If my armor breaks I'll fuse it back together", so I have to keep moving on, as you taught in your songs. If there is something afterlife, I really hope to see you.

Goodbye my Angel

It's been 4 years since that day.
They say time is supposed to heal you
But my scars are still open
I don't know well how it works
But I can say that it still sucks.
I'm so done with everything. I don't even know why, after all this years.I still need to tell you something.
Maybe it's because I always thought that we were similar.I always thought that you could understand me.Maybe that's why I'm here now. I would like to be strong like you. I would like to scream:" In the end it doesn't even matter".
I always felt completely understood by you, with your songs. Every time that I listen you, I have goosebumps; your voice is unique. I always love when u say: "I will never be anything 'til I break away from me"; because you're right; but I'm scared, scared because I'm 20 and I haven't found my place yet; a place for my head, where I can finally be myself. The truth is that I'm also tired, I'm tired of running away from who I really am, but I wanna change who I am, I wanna be proud of my self, even I'm lost right now, I will keep fighting, because I know that I can't faint. I can't faint because I'm not letting my life passing by my eyes without living it. I wanna live, I wanna love, I wanna cry, I wanna suffer and I wanna scream. That's why I'm waiting, I'm waiting to heal, because I will not let anyone put me down anymore. I will try, no matter how hard it will be, no matter what it'll cost. I will try; I have to.

Hey, I know
I know what you desire
I know how you feel
I know that you are tired
tired of all the shit the world
Has thrown at you.
I know what you want:
you want to be happy and
you want to finally find your peace.

But tell me, do you deserve it?
After all you have done,
After all the negative thoughts
that are stucked in your head;
Do you really think you can find happiness?
After all the mistakes you committed
all the sadness you created.

How dare you pretend to be happy?
How dare you want to be happy?
You can't, and you won't.
You're broken and nothing can really change it.
You know that, that's why you can't be happy;
and it doesn't matter what you do.
You can keep yourself busy, with all your projects
with your masks, you can deny every time you want
but you can't run from the truth: You are a monster.
You can only bring despair, and pain.
Just look at you, come on!

Take a good look at yourself in the mirror.
Do you see how disturbing you are?
How can you even bear it?
Only a moster could do it. Exactly
everything around you screams that.
It's already inside you, can you feel it?
The realization of your narcissistic way to be
The misery in which you live in.

Everyone thinks that you are a mistake
A pathetic person that shouldn't even exist
Someone full of regrets like you
What could ever do in life? I'll tell you: nothing.
Why don't you put an end to your life and make everyone happy?
You are weak, useless. So... do it. come on! What are you waiting for?

What's the point man? Why are you so desperate?
Nobody really cares about you then
why are you still hoping that someone will save you?
You know that it won't happen....
And you know the hilarious part in all of this?
This is all your fault. You created all of this
You have become the monster you hate so much
You have failed yourself and everyone else around you.
You are alone now.
And you'll die alone.