24/04/2019
0 recensioniCap 1: A Good Friendship
It was a windy evening in Exeter. Summer was almost over and the days were shortening fast. This is why when Amber walked out of the Institute into the backyard, she was surprised and pleased to see a strange light spreading in the sky, behind the clouds. It wasn’t the kind of light that you could see during the sunset: it was white and it lit up everything under it, like a goodbye before the darkness of the night could suffocate it. Amber walked on the gravel feeling the little stones crack under her feet. A blow of wind hit her and she smelled it with a grin. This was her favorite time of the year, when it wasn’t clear what kind of season it was. Sometimes there were incredible perfumes spreading from the trees, other times it seemed like the sun could have molten the stone; the moment she loved the most was when the fall revealed itself as ready to come, when the trees turned red and yellow. The wind was like a reminder that summer would be over any day now, and they should be prepared.
The girl went through the backyard to sit down in the middle of it. She looked around in wonder: Kit had told her they should leave L.A. at eleven in the morning, six pm in England.
When he had known about their trip to Los Angeles, Kit had been furious. She had never seen him like that: red in the face, with sparkling eyes full of anger. It had been scary when Amber had found him outside of his house, punching the hard wall with blood all over his hands and t-shirt. He’d had tears in his eyes when she had pulled him back from the wall; hadn’t made resistance while she drew a couple of iratzes on his arm. After that, he hadn’t talked to her for two days.
Amber had wondered why he had been so furious about going to L.A., but nothing came to mind. Of course, she knew Kit had been born there and he had lost his father there. But that reaction… something else had happened, something that had made him join the Carstairs family and leave Los Angeles, though she couldn’t quite tell what. She had grown used to knowing Kit well over the past two years, knowing all of his secrets, no matter how small or insignificant – even when he’d gotten drunk by mistake after excepting some weird beverage from a faerie downtown. Acknowledging that he hadn’t told her everything, that there was something in his past she hadn’t got access to, was unsettling. But, if she really thought about it, Kit could have been a totally different person before she’d met him.
The door of the Institute opened and a boy walked out distracting Amber from her thoughts. He was tall, and even more now that the girl was looking at him from below. His curled brown hair was pulled up in a man bun, and looked almost black in the fading light of the sunset. His emerald eyes fixed on Amber while he went through the backyard, whichlight in one hand and one of his hoodies in the other. Ax Lightblade reached the girl and sat down next to her. “Little cold to be sitting in the middle of the backyard at this time of the day, ain’t it?” he asked. He handed her his hoodie, smiling. Amber couldn’t help but noticing that his fingers were bleeding and he was holding an anti-stress. She took the hoodie and held his hand, analyzing it. He pulled away scratching his neck: “Please don’t do that, I already have a father, three brothers and a soon-to-be sister in law telling me I shouldn’t bite my nails.” “I was just making sure they were okay.” Amber answered. “Thanks for the hoodie, by the way.” Ax’s face seemed to suddenly light up: “You’re welcome! I was gonna pick one your size, but you just look so cute in the bigger ones…” Amber, who had just put the hoodie on, was folding her sleeves up. Ax was her size, but he also was the last of five children – and his brother Jonas had stress-eaten for more than a year after their mother had died. “I can’t thank you for that.” She said pushing him. He rolled on his back, without, though, forgetting to get hold of her arm first. They both fell on the gavel and a small fight began: Ax was keeping hold of Amber while she battled to free her arms and punch him. In the end Ax rolled over and placed himself atop of Amber, looking at her with a sly smile: “I guess I win this one, Havenfall.” He said keeping his nose one inch away from hers. She moved forward and made their lips meets for a second. When she pulled away, he was looking at her with an half surprised-half pleased expression: “I always get a win, Lightblade.” She said, and laughed. He pulled back dragging her with him. “That’s one of the things I like about you.” He said smiling at her. He was beautiful, Amber thought, not the kind of beautiful his older brothers were – man-ish, kind of dark with their brown hair – but the beautiful a guy who wasn’t quite a an yet was. Ax didn’t look his age at all, Amber remembered that had been the first thing she had noticed about him. He looked one or two years younger at least, with his rounded jaw and big green eyes; even though he was almost eighteen he didn’t have any facial hair, which Amber liked and disliked all at once. But she couldn’t deny to herself that he was beautiful, in a much sweeter way than any boy his age.
Ax turned around looking at the backyard and narrowed his eyes: “Do you think they’re going to arrive any time soon? I think dinner is almost ready.” Amber checked the big clock on the Institute’s tower: it was a quarter past six. “We can survive a few more minutes.” She observed. She wasn’t done speaking when a light appeared in the middle of the yard dropping four people on the gravel. One of the three tallest ones fell on his knees, only to rush back up and throw up in a bush a second later. Kit pulled away from the bush rubbing a sleeve against his lip. He looked green-ish, and kind of unstable on his knees: “Every. Single. Time.” He hissed more to himself than anyone else. Ax fell back laughing hard while Amber stepped forward to hold her friend by the elbow. “At least this time you didn’t pass out, that is an improvement.” Mr Carstairs observed gaining one of Kit’s most fiery looks. “It isn’t funny.” He whispered, but he gave up protesting when he noticed Mrs Gray was holding back from laughing too. Instead he looked at Amber: “Good… uhm… evening, I guess? It’s hard to say when you come from a lit up morning.” He greeted her. He was getting some of his natural color back and seemed a bit more stable, so Amber let go of him: “It’s almost half past six.” She answered. Kit smiled. “I love it.” He said. Amber was pretty sure only she had heard him. “Ax!” someone screamed. The two of them turned around just in time to see Marissa throwing herself on Ax. The poor boy, who had just recovered from laughing, fell down again. “Oh, hey little princess.” Ax said while the little girl sat on his stomach. “Did you miss me?” Marissa jumped up and down obviously excited: “Me fight!” she screamed. Amber knew Ax had been teaching Marissa how to hold a sword since she was always upset that Kit could train and she couldn’t (of course, they only used wooden swords). “That’s not an answer to my question, though.” The boy observed poking her in the belly. Marissa screamed with joy and hugged him tight. Amber grinned: Ax had always been good with kids, or so he told her, but she had never seen him so happy around Ellie, her own sister who was Mar’s age, and it was cute to watch.
“Okay you two, you can continue your lovely reunion inside.” Mrs Gray said, and Ax stood up with his arms at his sides, while Marissa held on to him like a koala. “Yes, I guess this weather is a little too cold for you, since, you know, you were in L.A.!” he said pointing at the gray clouds above their heads. “Trust me,” Kit said sighing: “Any weather is better than L.A.” he picked up his suitcase, which had stumbled on the ground with the other two, and walked straight to the door. Amber noticed the tension in his shoulders and made herself a reminder to talk to him later. After exchanging an alarmed look, Mr Carstairs and Mrs Gray followed him into the Institute.
The inside of the Institute was far warmer than the back yard. Enormous adamas walls spread hot air in the rooms. Ever since the system had been invented an year earlier, almost every Institute and some of the Shadowhunters’ houses in England had been provided with adamas from the Iron City. Amber and Kit were now leaning on the wall, extremely grateful for that investment. Ax had gone to assign the Cairstairs their rooms and find out what was in line for dinner. He was a master of sneaking into the kitchen and stealing some food, which made Keira, the Institute’s tutor and cook, go nuts.
“I really missed this in L.A.” Kit said closing his eyes and pressing his palms on the stone. Amber raised an eyebrow: “You don’t need hot adamas there. It’s always hot.” She observed with a sceptic tone. Kit opened an eye: “I like it here better.” He explained with a grin. Amber sighed: she would have loved to live anywhere hotter, or by the sea. Devon was very nice during the summer, but not quite as beautiful as California, in her opinion. But maybe Kit knew better, having lived in both places. “Do you think Mr Lightblade will let me practice tonight? I really can’t think of going to sleep.” He asked, changing the subject. Amber thought about it: Ax’s dad was a very strict man, maybe he would mind someone throwing knives in the gym’s wall at three in the morning. “I don’t know. Maybe you shouldn’t ask him.” She answered biting her lip. She knew building up to it would be impossible, especially since Kit was a very good lie detector. He would know something was wrong right away. And he always knew when she had something on her mind. “Yeah, I guess I won’t.” he said and smirked, looking a lot like Jace Herondale. Amber bit her lip: she always forgot the two of them were related.
“You’re staring at me.” The boy said without looking at her. She blinked: “What’s going on?” he asked. Amber opened her mouth with no idea what to respond. She felt her hands suddenly cold against the adamas. “You look like you’re going to vomit any second – and please don’t, I really wouldn’t want to go again.” Kit added almost turning green.
Amber hesitated. She would need a lot of courage to do this. She had pictured herself in front of Kit like this for the past week. She had imagined she would be good at it, and he would say yes. But now she wasn’t all that sure anymore. What if he said no? She had never considered that option.
“Stop standing there like a statue and say it. Spill it out, girl!” Kit encouraged her. Amber took a deep breath, there was no going back now: “I’ve been thinking for some time now” she bit her lip again. Seriously? How could it be so hard? “and I think we should be parabatai, you and I.” She said all with one breath.
Kit stood for a moment keeping his mouth tightly shut, surprised. This is it. Amber thought: He’s saying no.
The boy upped his chin and scratched his neck, reasoning. “I don’t know…” he said with a lost gaze “We aren’t really that close.” Amber’s heart lost a beat while he looked at her with an unsure expression. “I mean, I guess we could – oh what the heck.” He said bursting into a loud laugh. Amber looked at him in surprise: she couldn’t breathe, as if all the air in her lungs had been sucked out of her mouth. Then Kit looked at her with a cheered gaze: “I’m just messing with you. Of course I will be you parabatai! I have been thinking of asking you myself.” He said and started laughing again. Amber felt her jaw fall, and she instantly pushed forward to punch him all over his chest: “I… have put such an effort… in this…” she hissed through her teeth: “Christopher… Herondale… I swear…” she threatened, but Kit put his arms around her so tightly she found her nose touching his. She couldn’t move. “Oh my little Amber!” he said. His voice was so soft it reminded Amber of Ax’s way of speaking to her when, at night, he woke up and called her to tell her about his dreams. Kit rest his forehead on her shoulder sighing happly. Amber did the same and they stood like that for some minutes. The girl’s heart was beating loudly and shaking her body: He said yes! Kit said yes! The little voice in her brain kept yelling. She was so happy she would have never let go of him. Except, of course, if a voice hadn’t broken the silence: “Well, this is just how good a friendship should be.”
They broke apart. There was a tall figure looking at them, only a few steps away. He had dark hair and an annoying grin Amber had always hated. Ax’s older brother Caden took a step forward and looked at them with his arms crossed over his chest. “I really wish I had a friend I could hug like that.” He said smiling at them. Kit smiled back, Amber felt the urgent need of slapping Caden in the middle of his handsome face. “We had a very deep conversation.” Kit explained. Caden nodded: “Yes, I got that. They sent me to find you: dinner is ready.” He said. Amber didn’t ask him why they hadn’t sent Ax; the boy had probably been found by Keira and assigned to setting up the table. “Okay, let’s go.” She said, and led Kit behind Caden pulling him by the wrist. She couldn’t wait to announce the good news to everyone. And, of course, come up with a plan to accidently stab Caden during training.
Ax was sitting on the windowsill and looked at the table with a sense of satisfaction: it looked perfect. He had placed every dish with careful precision, like he always did, and the result gave him a great sense of calm. Of course, he had had to bring a table up from the kitchen since five more people were going to eat here, but he found it very nice anyway. It was an unusual paranoia of his to fixate on every detail, which often made him forget about everything else. For example, that slightly crooked portrait of his great-grandfather Dominic Proudspark which hanged over the old fireplace, really gave him the shakes. He would have wanted to set it straight, but it was way too high for him to reach even standing up on a chair – not that he hadn’t tried. Once he’d even put two chairs one on top of the other, only realizing after that there was no way he could jump on top of them without breaking a leg. Amber always teased him because of his obsession, even though she appreciated when he offered to tidy her room.
The boy looked away from the painting annoyed and focused on his hands: they were clean and calloused. The scars of old runes ran all over them, mixing with the ones from dagger cuts. He looked at his right index and sighed. The black was spreading and the pain with it. He was lucky no one had noticed yet, but he knew they would, eventually, and then he would have to answer all of their questions. He had decided not to tell anyone about it because he’d thought it would go away: it looked like a bruise, just a little darker than usual; but now it was becoming bigger and no healing rune had worked on it.
He looked up hearing some steps at the door. Connor came in cheerfully chatting with his phone and stopped dead to text something. Ax made a disgusted noise: ever since Connor and Penny Keenwood had started dating they had been annoyingly in contact 24/7. He heavily jumped down from the sill and his brother gazed away from his phone, surprised: “Oh, I didn’t see you Ax.” He said. He smiled so widely the boy could almost count all of his teeth. Ax rolled his eyes. “Did you know Penny’s mum is going to Stratford for a week? They say some kind of demonic association has become uncontrollable there.” Mrs Keenwood was a specialized Hunter who acted against demonic sects. She was very important in the English Clave and reported directly to New York City (where the new Conclave had been established).
“Well, that doesn’t seem so good.” Ax commented while his brother kept smiling. “Those sects are very dangerous.” Connor’s smile seemed to fade away slowly, and the boy nodded energetically: “Of course, I too am very worried.” He said. Ax ginned to himself; Connor was a very nice guy and an excellent archer, but he was always surprised of how dumb and naïve he turned out to be in most situations.
They didn’t have the pleasure of continuing their conversation since a moment later almost the whole family and guests walked into the dining room chatting loudly. The two brothers looked around and Ax found himself smiling – only a good, nice family dinner started with that kind of noise. The Institute in this particular moment was very crowded: aside from Amber and the Cairstairs, both Keira and Jonas were there, and Caden was visiting. The only family member missing was Theo, who lived in Goldsborough, in Yorkshire. After a moment Ax found the two people he was looking for and went over to them with a big smile. Amber and Kit looked somewhat happy and strangely excited: “Did you two try to smoke violets again? Hear me out, I didn’t think it was a good idea the first time you did it.” He said. A few months back Kit had picked up some violets from the Institute’s greenhouse and he and Amber had rolled them up and smoked them behind the building. They had been high for more than an hour after. “I’m just going to say that we talked.” Amber answered showing a beautiful smile. Ax smiled back without being able to help himself. “So you told each other secrets like two very annoying thirteen-year-olds? That is so sweet.” He teased, but neither of them looked offended: they laughed and led him to the table.
It took more than five minutes for everyone to settle down at the table. Ax noticed every time it seemed that the dinner was about to start, someone had to get up and do something. Keira had to get something from the kitchen, his dad had to write a Fire Message he’d forgotten to send out, Mrs Gray had forgotten Marissa’s bib, and so on.
When they finally stopped moving and Keira had put the first dish in the middle of the table, Ax’s stomach was starting to protest. He got himself some fish and covered it in mayonnaise, just as he liked it. Mr Carstairs, who was sitting in front of him, inclined his head and narrowed his eyes, as if deciding if what he was doing was acceptable or just very gross. “Don’t waste your time.” Jonas said before the man could comment: “We’ve been trying since he was three. He just has a bad taste.” Mr Cairstairs looked away from Ax’s plate: “Anything is better than one of Isabelle Lightwood’s meatballs.” He said. Jonas lifted an eyebrow and gazed at the boy’s fish. Ax started eating trying not to mind him: “If you don’t finish it, I’m putting you on cleaning duty.” Jonas threatened. “Thsnfar.” His brother tried to say. Ax swallowed: “That is not fear, I set the table up.”
“How is your training going? I know you’ve taken on the katana.” Mr Carstairs asked Jonas before he could add anything else. The boy immediately forgot about the fish and looked at him with sudden interest: “I have. It’s an amazing weapon, very hard to use, but extremely effective.” He said, and revealed the weapon from under the table. “Where were you keeping that?” Ax asked. Jonas looked at him with narrowed eyes: “Where do you keep your weapons, Ax?” he asked. “My belt, but usually I don’t keep it on me at dinner.” “You should.” It was Mr Carstairs who had spoken “If you’re going to graduate, you are going to want to have your best weapons on you at any time.” Ax put his hands forward: “I didn’t say I don’t have any weapon. I just don’t like keeping my belt on without my gear.”
Jonas coughed, hiding a laugh. Ax hated when his brothers made fun of his habits. “Come on, Jonas, stop teasing your brother.” Mr Carstairs said. “Sorry.” The boy apologized. “Whatever.” Ax answered. Mr Carstairs gave him a warning look before taking the katana to examine it.
Ax turned around to find out what Amber and Kit were up to. They were whispering to each other in excitement, and the boy thought that they actually looked like two thirteen-year-olds chatting about a boy who’d gazed at them in the hallways (he looked a lot of American TV shows when he was alone in his room). “Can you pass the salt?” Connor asked. He was sitting on his right, for some reason, and this was the first time he’d looked away from his phone screen since the dinner had started. Ax gave him the salt and took the chance to glance at the chat: it was not full of hearts as he had imagined, there were very long texts from Connor and some shorter answers from Penny. Ax wondered if it was bad that he hoped for their relationship to be going badly. Connor looked at the last text smiling, then shut his phone and put it away to start eating his untouched meal. “Have I told you how amazing Penny is?” he demanded stuffing his face with tomatoes. “It wouldn’t be the twentieth time today.” Ax answered rolling his eyes. “Yes but, I mean, she truly is the best person I’ve ever met. Even better than the Angel.” Ax held back from pointing out that Raziel wasn’t a person or that Connor had never actually met him, and that he didn’t think meeting any angel would be very pleasant anyway. Instead he took more fish and some more mayonnaise, while his brother looked at him with a disgusted expression. Ax ignored him, but he kept an eye on him while he was eating, to catch any signal of unhappiness. Connor seemed perfectly normal, though, no clue whatsoever of any disagreement going on between him and Penny, or anything else happening in his life. Ax shook his head: it was Connor he was thinking of, he could have never had any problem, thinking about his childlike behavior – which was one hundred percent unintentional. If he thought of him when Connor was twelve and Ax was eleven, he didn’t see any difference from now. It was like he had missed his teenage face, or he had simply stopped growing. He couldn’t remember him ever screaming to their dad, protesting about anything. Every time he was asked to do something, he did it without a word. Obviously, this meant Ax was the bad kid, because Connor always does what I ask him to. In the past few years, his father had called him by his full name more than necessary. Whenever he did something wrong, he went: “Arthur James Lightblade, we need to talk.” With the most terribly calm voice. Ax couldn’t remember Jonas or Theo as teenagers, but he knew none of them – not even Caden, who was some character – had ever been grounded as much as he had, because they had never had anyone to be compared to.
Ax’s thoughts were interrupted by a movement on his left: Amber and Kit were standing up, holding hands so tight he could see their veins popping out. Kit cleared his voice: “Hey! Can we have everyone’s attention, please?” he asked when the murmuring didn’t stop. Everyone looked at him in surprise and the room was suddenly silent. Ax could see his own confusion in Mr Carstairs and his dad expression. “Uhm… thank you.” Kit bit his lip before speaking. “We have an announcement to make. Don’t worry” he added looking at his dad’s face “it’s a good thing.” He exchanged a look with Amber, who nodded. What was going on with does two?
“So, we’ve talked.” She said with a nervous smile “And we’ve decided to become parabatai.” Ax blinked, absorbing what his girlfriend had just said. All around him was silent. A second later, the room exploded with cheers and relief. Mrs Gray hugged Kit and Amber tight: “I knew it!” she screamed. Ax felt his legs moving and a moment later he was standing and hugging Amber. “Wo!” the girl exclaimed, but she returned the hug. Ax pushed away to hug Kit too, but didn’t stop looking at her. “I am so happy for you guys.” He whispered in Kit’s ear. “Thank you Ax.”
Tuff. Ax looked over his extended arm with satisfaction when the throwing star hit the center of the target. He kneeled to pick another one when something hissed over his head. He straightened alarmed. “Missed.” Kit said with a grimace. Ax stared at him shocked: “Are you trying to kill me or is it just that your aim is terrible?” he asked. “Both. I thought maybe if I killed you I would have a chance of winning.” Amber, by the other side of Kit, laughed.
They were hanging out in the training room, celebrating the future parabatai bond with a throwing star contest and a leftover cake Ax had stolen from the kitchen while Keira wasn’t looking.
Amber threw a star and it stuck close to the center of her target. “I do not think you would have much chance anyway.” Kit wasn’t bad at aiming, but he had not been training for as long as the other two had.
Ax threw the star he was holding at it knocked the other one on the floor. “Very impressive.” Kit observed. “But you know,” he added ironically “Amber’s already crazy about you.” Ax grinned and gazed at her. The girl had gone red from head to toe. Kit was looking, too. “You two need to stop talking as if I weren’t there.” The girl said. It was true, they did it a lot. It was something they liked doing when it was just the three of them alone, like joking about Kit’s bad skills in archery or Ax’s obsessions. It was their thing.
Kit took a throwing star from the bucket at his feet and threw it towards the target. It stuck in the wall beside it: “It’s a good thing I don’t like distance weapons. I would do terrible on the battle field.” He commented. Ax could not help but agree with him: he himself loved throwing stars and knives, and especially his axe (which he had learnt how to throw when he was ten), but Kit was much better off at jumping around to kill demons rather than standing still from a good viewing point. Though, Ax enjoyed hunting with him. They made an excellent team, being able to watch each other’s backs. Of course, Kit was always at his absolute best when Amber was around – then again, so was Ax. Amber was maybe the one person able to boost the both of them, with her talented hand giving them the prettiest and most powerful runes.
“Do you guys wanna settle it with a slice of cake? I’m tired.” The girl said in that moment. Kit nodded gratefully and went to retrieve the stars. Ax took a dagger and started cutting the cake with it. “Don’t let Keira see you. You know what she says: every weapon has a dignity, kids, and we need to respect it.” Amber said sitting down on the floor next to him. Ax laughed. Of all the tutors Ax had had, Keira was far the craziest. He could only assume it was because of her family relationship with Zak, Amber’s step brother, who was insane.
“Don’t let Kit see you because that is his favorite dagger.” Kit said appearing with the throwing stars’ bucket. Ax looked down at the dagger in surprise and saw the heron carved in the guard of the dagger. “Sorry, buddy. I didn’t realize it was yours; you should not leave it on the floor.” Kit took the dagger from his hand and cleaned it with a tissue: “It was in my belt.” Amber giggled and Ax gave her an offended look. “You should support me.” The girl laughed louder and kissed him on the cheek.
They ate the cake in silence, and Ax thought that something was really good only when no one talked while eating it. That cake truly was a treat, one of Caiden’s special recipes. When the plate was empty, a moment of silence followed, while they all still tasted the cake in their mouths.
Then Amber talked: “So, Kit. Are you going to tell us about L.A.?” she asked giving the boy a strange look. Kit swallowed, even though Ax knew he had finished his cake, and bit his lip. “Uhm, it was fun, I guess. Of course, the Blackthorns were very nice.” He said in what seemed to Ax a very tense voice. He had clearly missed something about Kit’s trip. “Nothing interesting happened? Nothing at all? I mean, you were in the City of Angels.” It was as if the boy had just swallowed a stone: he was red in the face and his fingers were curling frenetically around the Herondale dagger he was holding. “I wouldn’t know…” “Oh, quit it. I know you two well, I saw your face earlier, in the backyard. Something’s happened, something important. And you better tell us.” At times, Amber could be very frightening so Ax could understand why Kit was paralyzed while he said: “Alright, fine! I’ll tell you what happened, but you have to promise me you will do nothing to meddle in it.” He looked at both of them and Ax wondered what could have happened that was so terrible. “We promise.” He said, since Amber looked like she was still deciding. Kit seemed to relax a bit.
“Well. When I was in L.A. I had a talk with an old friend..."
The girl went through the backyard to sit down in the middle of it. She looked around in wonder: Kit had told her they should leave L.A. at eleven in the morning, six pm in England.
When he had known about their trip to Los Angeles, Kit had been furious. She had never seen him like that: red in the face, with sparkling eyes full of anger. It had been scary when Amber had found him outside of his house, punching the hard wall with blood all over his hands and t-shirt. He’d had tears in his eyes when she had pulled him back from the wall; hadn’t made resistance while she drew a couple of iratzes on his arm. After that, he hadn’t talked to her for two days.
Amber had wondered why he had been so furious about going to L.A., but nothing came to mind. Of course, she knew Kit had been born there and he had lost his father there. But that reaction… something else had happened, something that had made him join the Carstairs family and leave Los Angeles, though she couldn’t quite tell what. She had grown used to knowing Kit well over the past two years, knowing all of his secrets, no matter how small or insignificant – even when he’d gotten drunk by mistake after excepting some weird beverage from a faerie downtown. Acknowledging that he hadn’t told her everything, that there was something in his past she hadn’t got access to, was unsettling. But, if she really thought about it, Kit could have been a totally different person before she’d met him.
The door of the Institute opened and a boy walked out distracting Amber from her thoughts. He was tall, and even more now that the girl was looking at him from below. His curled brown hair was pulled up in a man bun, and looked almost black in the fading light of the sunset. His emerald eyes fixed on Amber while he went through the backyard, whichlight in one hand and one of his hoodies in the other. Ax Lightblade reached the girl and sat down next to her. “Little cold to be sitting in the middle of the backyard at this time of the day, ain’t it?” he asked. He handed her his hoodie, smiling. Amber couldn’t help but noticing that his fingers were bleeding and he was holding an anti-stress. She took the hoodie and held his hand, analyzing it. He pulled away scratching his neck: “Please don’t do that, I already have a father, three brothers and a soon-to-be sister in law telling me I shouldn’t bite my nails.” “I was just making sure they were okay.” Amber answered. “Thanks for the hoodie, by the way.” Ax’s face seemed to suddenly light up: “You’re welcome! I was gonna pick one your size, but you just look so cute in the bigger ones…” Amber, who had just put the hoodie on, was folding her sleeves up. Ax was her size, but he also was the last of five children – and his brother Jonas had stress-eaten for more than a year after their mother had died. “I can’t thank you for that.” She said pushing him. He rolled on his back, without, though, forgetting to get hold of her arm first. They both fell on the gavel and a small fight began: Ax was keeping hold of Amber while she battled to free her arms and punch him. In the end Ax rolled over and placed himself atop of Amber, looking at her with a sly smile: “I guess I win this one, Havenfall.” He said keeping his nose one inch away from hers. She moved forward and made their lips meets for a second. When she pulled away, he was looking at her with an half surprised-half pleased expression: “I always get a win, Lightblade.” She said, and laughed. He pulled back dragging her with him. “That’s one of the things I like about you.” He said smiling at her. He was beautiful, Amber thought, not the kind of beautiful his older brothers were – man-ish, kind of dark with their brown hair – but the beautiful a guy who wasn’t quite a an yet was. Ax didn’t look his age at all, Amber remembered that had been the first thing she had noticed about him. He looked one or two years younger at least, with his rounded jaw and big green eyes; even though he was almost eighteen he didn’t have any facial hair, which Amber liked and disliked all at once. But she couldn’t deny to herself that he was beautiful, in a much sweeter way than any boy his age.
Ax turned around looking at the backyard and narrowed his eyes: “Do you think they’re going to arrive any time soon? I think dinner is almost ready.” Amber checked the big clock on the Institute’s tower: it was a quarter past six. “We can survive a few more minutes.” She observed. She wasn’t done speaking when a light appeared in the middle of the yard dropping four people on the gravel. One of the three tallest ones fell on his knees, only to rush back up and throw up in a bush a second later. Kit pulled away from the bush rubbing a sleeve against his lip. He looked green-ish, and kind of unstable on his knees: “Every. Single. Time.” He hissed more to himself than anyone else. Ax fell back laughing hard while Amber stepped forward to hold her friend by the elbow. “At least this time you didn’t pass out, that is an improvement.” Mr Carstairs observed gaining one of Kit’s most fiery looks. “It isn’t funny.” He whispered, but he gave up protesting when he noticed Mrs Gray was holding back from laughing too. Instead he looked at Amber: “Good… uhm… evening, I guess? It’s hard to say when you come from a lit up morning.” He greeted her. He was getting some of his natural color back and seemed a bit more stable, so Amber let go of him: “It’s almost half past six.” She answered. Kit smiled. “I love it.” He said. Amber was pretty sure only she had heard him. “Ax!” someone screamed. The two of them turned around just in time to see Marissa throwing herself on Ax. The poor boy, who had just recovered from laughing, fell down again. “Oh, hey little princess.” Ax said while the little girl sat on his stomach. “Did you miss me?” Marissa jumped up and down obviously excited: “Me fight!” she screamed. Amber knew Ax had been teaching Marissa how to hold a sword since she was always upset that Kit could train and she couldn’t (of course, they only used wooden swords). “That’s not an answer to my question, though.” The boy observed poking her in the belly. Marissa screamed with joy and hugged him tight. Amber grinned: Ax had always been good with kids, or so he told her, but she had never seen him so happy around Ellie, her own sister who was Mar’s age, and it was cute to watch.
“Okay you two, you can continue your lovely reunion inside.” Mrs Gray said, and Ax stood up with his arms at his sides, while Marissa held on to him like a koala. “Yes, I guess this weather is a little too cold for you, since, you know, you were in L.A.!” he said pointing at the gray clouds above their heads. “Trust me,” Kit said sighing: “Any weather is better than L.A.” he picked up his suitcase, which had stumbled on the ground with the other two, and walked straight to the door. Amber noticed the tension in his shoulders and made herself a reminder to talk to him later. After exchanging an alarmed look, Mr Carstairs and Mrs Gray followed him into the Institute.
The inside of the Institute was far warmer than the back yard. Enormous adamas walls spread hot air in the rooms. Ever since the system had been invented an year earlier, almost every Institute and some of the Shadowhunters’ houses in England had been provided with adamas from the Iron City. Amber and Kit were now leaning on the wall, extremely grateful for that investment. Ax had gone to assign the Cairstairs their rooms and find out what was in line for dinner. He was a master of sneaking into the kitchen and stealing some food, which made Keira, the Institute’s tutor and cook, go nuts.
“I really missed this in L.A.” Kit said closing his eyes and pressing his palms on the stone. Amber raised an eyebrow: “You don’t need hot adamas there. It’s always hot.” She observed with a sceptic tone. Kit opened an eye: “I like it here better.” He explained with a grin. Amber sighed: she would have loved to live anywhere hotter, or by the sea. Devon was very nice during the summer, but not quite as beautiful as California, in her opinion. But maybe Kit knew better, having lived in both places. “Do you think Mr Lightblade will let me practice tonight? I really can’t think of going to sleep.” He asked, changing the subject. Amber thought about it: Ax’s dad was a very strict man, maybe he would mind someone throwing knives in the gym’s wall at three in the morning. “I don’t know. Maybe you shouldn’t ask him.” She answered biting her lip. She knew building up to it would be impossible, especially since Kit was a very good lie detector. He would know something was wrong right away. And he always knew when she had something on her mind. “Yeah, I guess I won’t.” he said and smirked, looking a lot like Jace Herondale. Amber bit her lip: she always forgot the two of them were related.
“You’re staring at me.” The boy said without looking at her. She blinked: “What’s going on?” he asked. Amber opened her mouth with no idea what to respond. She felt her hands suddenly cold against the adamas. “You look like you’re going to vomit any second – and please don’t, I really wouldn’t want to go again.” Kit added almost turning green.
Amber hesitated. She would need a lot of courage to do this. She had pictured herself in front of Kit like this for the past week. She had imagined she would be good at it, and he would say yes. But now she wasn’t all that sure anymore. What if he said no? She had never considered that option.
“Stop standing there like a statue and say it. Spill it out, girl!” Kit encouraged her. Amber took a deep breath, there was no going back now: “I’ve been thinking for some time now” she bit her lip again. Seriously? How could it be so hard? “and I think we should be parabatai, you and I.” She said all with one breath.
Kit stood for a moment keeping his mouth tightly shut, surprised. This is it. Amber thought: He’s saying no.
The boy upped his chin and scratched his neck, reasoning. “I don’t know…” he said with a lost gaze “We aren’t really that close.” Amber’s heart lost a beat while he looked at her with an unsure expression. “I mean, I guess we could – oh what the heck.” He said bursting into a loud laugh. Amber looked at him in surprise: she couldn’t breathe, as if all the air in her lungs had been sucked out of her mouth. Then Kit looked at her with a cheered gaze: “I’m just messing with you. Of course I will be you parabatai! I have been thinking of asking you myself.” He said and started laughing again. Amber felt her jaw fall, and she instantly pushed forward to punch him all over his chest: “I… have put such an effort… in this…” she hissed through her teeth: “Christopher… Herondale… I swear…” she threatened, but Kit put his arms around her so tightly she found her nose touching his. She couldn’t move. “Oh my little Amber!” he said. His voice was so soft it reminded Amber of Ax’s way of speaking to her when, at night, he woke up and called her to tell her about his dreams. Kit rest his forehead on her shoulder sighing happly. Amber did the same and they stood like that for some minutes. The girl’s heart was beating loudly and shaking her body: He said yes! Kit said yes! The little voice in her brain kept yelling. She was so happy she would have never let go of him. Except, of course, if a voice hadn’t broken the silence: “Well, this is just how good a friendship should be.”
They broke apart. There was a tall figure looking at them, only a few steps away. He had dark hair and an annoying grin Amber had always hated. Ax’s older brother Caden took a step forward and looked at them with his arms crossed over his chest. “I really wish I had a friend I could hug like that.” He said smiling at them. Kit smiled back, Amber felt the urgent need of slapping Caden in the middle of his handsome face. “We had a very deep conversation.” Kit explained. Caden nodded: “Yes, I got that. They sent me to find you: dinner is ready.” He said. Amber didn’t ask him why they hadn’t sent Ax; the boy had probably been found by Keira and assigned to setting up the table. “Okay, let’s go.” She said, and led Kit behind Caden pulling him by the wrist. She couldn’t wait to announce the good news to everyone. And, of course, come up with a plan to accidently stab Caden during training.
Ax was sitting on the windowsill and looked at the table with a sense of satisfaction: it looked perfect. He had placed every dish with careful precision, like he always did, and the result gave him a great sense of calm. Of course, he had had to bring a table up from the kitchen since five more people were going to eat here, but he found it very nice anyway. It was an unusual paranoia of his to fixate on every detail, which often made him forget about everything else. For example, that slightly crooked portrait of his great-grandfather Dominic Proudspark which hanged over the old fireplace, really gave him the shakes. He would have wanted to set it straight, but it was way too high for him to reach even standing up on a chair – not that he hadn’t tried. Once he’d even put two chairs one on top of the other, only realizing after that there was no way he could jump on top of them without breaking a leg. Amber always teased him because of his obsession, even though she appreciated when he offered to tidy her room.
The boy looked away from the painting annoyed and focused on his hands: they were clean and calloused. The scars of old runes ran all over them, mixing with the ones from dagger cuts. He looked at his right index and sighed. The black was spreading and the pain with it. He was lucky no one had noticed yet, but he knew they would, eventually, and then he would have to answer all of their questions. He had decided not to tell anyone about it because he’d thought it would go away: it looked like a bruise, just a little darker than usual; but now it was becoming bigger and no healing rune had worked on it.
He looked up hearing some steps at the door. Connor came in cheerfully chatting with his phone and stopped dead to text something. Ax made a disgusted noise: ever since Connor and Penny Keenwood had started dating they had been annoyingly in contact 24/7. He heavily jumped down from the sill and his brother gazed away from his phone, surprised: “Oh, I didn’t see you Ax.” He said. He smiled so widely the boy could almost count all of his teeth. Ax rolled his eyes. “Did you know Penny’s mum is going to Stratford for a week? They say some kind of demonic association has become uncontrollable there.” Mrs Keenwood was a specialized Hunter who acted against demonic sects. She was very important in the English Clave and reported directly to New York City (where the new Conclave had been established).
“Well, that doesn’t seem so good.” Ax commented while his brother kept smiling. “Those sects are very dangerous.” Connor’s smile seemed to fade away slowly, and the boy nodded energetically: “Of course, I too am very worried.” He said. Ax ginned to himself; Connor was a very nice guy and an excellent archer, but he was always surprised of how dumb and naïve he turned out to be in most situations.
They didn’t have the pleasure of continuing their conversation since a moment later almost the whole family and guests walked into the dining room chatting loudly. The two brothers looked around and Ax found himself smiling – only a good, nice family dinner started with that kind of noise. The Institute in this particular moment was very crowded: aside from Amber and the Cairstairs, both Keira and Jonas were there, and Caden was visiting. The only family member missing was Theo, who lived in Goldsborough, in Yorkshire. After a moment Ax found the two people he was looking for and went over to them with a big smile. Amber and Kit looked somewhat happy and strangely excited: “Did you two try to smoke violets again? Hear me out, I didn’t think it was a good idea the first time you did it.” He said. A few months back Kit had picked up some violets from the Institute’s greenhouse and he and Amber had rolled them up and smoked them behind the building. They had been high for more than an hour after. “I’m just going to say that we talked.” Amber answered showing a beautiful smile. Ax smiled back without being able to help himself. “So you told each other secrets like two very annoying thirteen-year-olds? That is so sweet.” He teased, but neither of them looked offended: they laughed and led him to the table.
It took more than five minutes for everyone to settle down at the table. Ax noticed every time it seemed that the dinner was about to start, someone had to get up and do something. Keira had to get something from the kitchen, his dad had to write a Fire Message he’d forgotten to send out, Mrs Gray had forgotten Marissa’s bib, and so on.
When they finally stopped moving and Keira had put the first dish in the middle of the table, Ax’s stomach was starting to protest. He got himself some fish and covered it in mayonnaise, just as he liked it. Mr Carstairs, who was sitting in front of him, inclined his head and narrowed his eyes, as if deciding if what he was doing was acceptable or just very gross. “Don’t waste your time.” Jonas said before the man could comment: “We’ve been trying since he was three. He just has a bad taste.” Mr Cairstairs looked away from Ax’s plate: “Anything is better than one of Isabelle Lightwood’s meatballs.” He said. Jonas lifted an eyebrow and gazed at the boy’s fish. Ax started eating trying not to mind him: “If you don’t finish it, I’m putting you on cleaning duty.” Jonas threatened. “Thsnfar.” His brother tried to say. Ax swallowed: “That is not fear, I set the table up.”
“How is your training going? I know you’ve taken on the katana.” Mr Carstairs asked Jonas before he could add anything else. The boy immediately forgot about the fish and looked at him with sudden interest: “I have. It’s an amazing weapon, very hard to use, but extremely effective.” He said, and revealed the weapon from under the table. “Where were you keeping that?” Ax asked. Jonas looked at him with narrowed eyes: “Where do you keep your weapons, Ax?” he asked. “My belt, but usually I don’t keep it on me at dinner.” “You should.” It was Mr Carstairs who had spoken “If you’re going to graduate, you are going to want to have your best weapons on you at any time.” Ax put his hands forward: “I didn’t say I don’t have any weapon. I just don’t like keeping my belt on without my gear.”
Jonas coughed, hiding a laugh. Ax hated when his brothers made fun of his habits. “Come on, Jonas, stop teasing your brother.” Mr Carstairs said. “Sorry.” The boy apologized. “Whatever.” Ax answered. Mr Carstairs gave him a warning look before taking the katana to examine it.
Ax turned around to find out what Amber and Kit were up to. They were whispering to each other in excitement, and the boy thought that they actually looked like two thirteen-year-olds chatting about a boy who’d gazed at them in the hallways (he looked a lot of American TV shows when he was alone in his room). “Can you pass the salt?” Connor asked. He was sitting on his right, for some reason, and this was the first time he’d looked away from his phone screen since the dinner had started. Ax gave him the salt and took the chance to glance at the chat: it was not full of hearts as he had imagined, there were very long texts from Connor and some shorter answers from Penny. Ax wondered if it was bad that he hoped for their relationship to be going badly. Connor looked at the last text smiling, then shut his phone and put it away to start eating his untouched meal. “Have I told you how amazing Penny is?” he demanded stuffing his face with tomatoes. “It wouldn’t be the twentieth time today.” Ax answered rolling his eyes. “Yes but, I mean, she truly is the best person I’ve ever met. Even better than the Angel.” Ax held back from pointing out that Raziel wasn’t a person or that Connor had never actually met him, and that he didn’t think meeting any angel would be very pleasant anyway. Instead he took more fish and some more mayonnaise, while his brother looked at him with a disgusted expression. Ax ignored him, but he kept an eye on him while he was eating, to catch any signal of unhappiness. Connor seemed perfectly normal, though, no clue whatsoever of any disagreement going on between him and Penny, or anything else happening in his life. Ax shook his head: it was Connor he was thinking of, he could have never had any problem, thinking about his childlike behavior – which was one hundred percent unintentional. If he thought of him when Connor was twelve and Ax was eleven, he didn’t see any difference from now. It was like he had missed his teenage face, or he had simply stopped growing. He couldn’t remember him ever screaming to their dad, protesting about anything. Every time he was asked to do something, he did it without a word. Obviously, this meant Ax was the bad kid, because Connor always does what I ask him to. In the past few years, his father had called him by his full name more than necessary. Whenever he did something wrong, he went: “Arthur James Lightblade, we need to talk.” With the most terribly calm voice. Ax couldn’t remember Jonas or Theo as teenagers, but he knew none of them – not even Caden, who was some character – had ever been grounded as much as he had, because they had never had anyone to be compared to.
Ax’s thoughts were interrupted by a movement on his left: Amber and Kit were standing up, holding hands so tight he could see their veins popping out. Kit cleared his voice: “Hey! Can we have everyone’s attention, please?” he asked when the murmuring didn’t stop. Everyone looked at him in surprise and the room was suddenly silent. Ax could see his own confusion in Mr Carstairs and his dad expression. “Uhm… thank you.” Kit bit his lip before speaking. “We have an announcement to make. Don’t worry” he added looking at his dad’s face “it’s a good thing.” He exchanged a look with Amber, who nodded. What was going on with does two?
“So, we’ve talked.” She said with a nervous smile “And we’ve decided to become parabatai.” Ax blinked, absorbing what his girlfriend had just said. All around him was silent. A second later, the room exploded with cheers and relief. Mrs Gray hugged Kit and Amber tight: “I knew it!” she screamed. Ax felt his legs moving and a moment later he was standing and hugging Amber. “Wo!” the girl exclaimed, but she returned the hug. Ax pushed away to hug Kit too, but didn’t stop looking at her. “I am so happy for you guys.” He whispered in Kit’s ear. “Thank you Ax.”
Tuff. Ax looked over his extended arm with satisfaction when the throwing star hit the center of the target. He kneeled to pick another one when something hissed over his head. He straightened alarmed. “Missed.” Kit said with a grimace. Ax stared at him shocked: “Are you trying to kill me or is it just that your aim is terrible?” he asked. “Both. I thought maybe if I killed you I would have a chance of winning.” Amber, by the other side of Kit, laughed.
They were hanging out in the training room, celebrating the future parabatai bond with a throwing star contest and a leftover cake Ax had stolen from the kitchen while Keira wasn’t looking.
Amber threw a star and it stuck close to the center of her target. “I do not think you would have much chance anyway.” Kit wasn’t bad at aiming, but he had not been training for as long as the other two had.
Ax threw the star he was holding at it knocked the other one on the floor. “Very impressive.” Kit observed. “But you know,” he added ironically “Amber’s already crazy about you.” Ax grinned and gazed at her. The girl had gone red from head to toe. Kit was looking, too. “You two need to stop talking as if I weren’t there.” The girl said. It was true, they did it a lot. It was something they liked doing when it was just the three of them alone, like joking about Kit’s bad skills in archery or Ax’s obsessions. It was their thing.
Kit took a throwing star from the bucket at his feet and threw it towards the target. It stuck in the wall beside it: “It’s a good thing I don’t like distance weapons. I would do terrible on the battle field.” He commented. Ax could not help but agree with him: he himself loved throwing stars and knives, and especially his axe (which he had learnt how to throw when he was ten), but Kit was much better off at jumping around to kill demons rather than standing still from a good viewing point. Though, Ax enjoyed hunting with him. They made an excellent team, being able to watch each other’s backs. Of course, Kit was always at his absolute best when Amber was around – then again, so was Ax. Amber was maybe the one person able to boost the both of them, with her talented hand giving them the prettiest and most powerful runes.
“Do you guys wanna settle it with a slice of cake? I’m tired.” The girl said in that moment. Kit nodded gratefully and went to retrieve the stars. Ax took a dagger and started cutting the cake with it. “Don’t let Keira see you. You know what she says: every weapon has a dignity, kids, and we need to respect it.” Amber said sitting down on the floor next to him. Ax laughed. Of all the tutors Ax had had, Keira was far the craziest. He could only assume it was because of her family relationship with Zak, Amber’s step brother, who was insane.
“Don’t let Kit see you because that is his favorite dagger.” Kit said appearing with the throwing stars’ bucket. Ax looked down at the dagger in surprise and saw the heron carved in the guard of the dagger. “Sorry, buddy. I didn’t realize it was yours; you should not leave it on the floor.” Kit took the dagger from his hand and cleaned it with a tissue: “It was in my belt.” Amber giggled and Ax gave her an offended look. “You should support me.” The girl laughed louder and kissed him on the cheek.
They ate the cake in silence, and Ax thought that something was really good only when no one talked while eating it. That cake truly was a treat, one of Caiden’s special recipes. When the plate was empty, a moment of silence followed, while they all still tasted the cake in their mouths.
Then Amber talked: “So, Kit. Are you going to tell us about L.A.?” she asked giving the boy a strange look. Kit swallowed, even though Ax knew he had finished his cake, and bit his lip. “Uhm, it was fun, I guess. Of course, the Blackthorns were very nice.” He said in what seemed to Ax a very tense voice. He had clearly missed something about Kit’s trip. “Nothing interesting happened? Nothing at all? I mean, you were in the City of Angels.” It was as if the boy had just swallowed a stone: he was red in the face and his fingers were curling frenetically around the Herondale dagger he was holding. “I wouldn’t know…” “Oh, quit it. I know you two well, I saw your face earlier, in the backyard. Something’s happened, something important. And you better tell us.” At times, Amber could be very frightening so Ax could understand why Kit was paralyzed while he said: “Alright, fine! I’ll tell you what happened, but you have to promise me you will do nothing to meddle in it.” He looked at both of them and Ax wondered what could have happened that was so terrible. “We promise.” He said, since Amber looked like she was still deciding. Kit seemed to relax a bit.
“Well. When I was in L.A. I had a talk with an old friend..."